My Mortal

[Evelyn]

MyImmortal Mary Sue style! Read and flame! And enjoy! And laugh! By the way, I'm not this bad. I just changed the words of MyImmortal

Chapter 1.

AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im marisuestic and Mary Sue vampires get fangs 2) 2 my gf (ew not in that way) swan, gracefulgurl888 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. U rok! Justin ur da luv of my awsum life u rok!

Hi my name is Silky Bright'ness Dyslexia Swan Bloooom and I have long silky blond hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and pink streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and eyes that liek change colour depending on man moooooooood. I'm not related to Olano Bloom but I wish I was because he's a major hottie. I'm a half maripire half wizard. I have smooth porcelain and pretty skin no acne. I'm a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a princess and super magical and pretty (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear anything and it ALWAYS liks GUD on me. For example today I was wearing a corset with matching beautiful frills amd lace around it it wuz expensiv but im rly pretty and da shopmattemdant gav it to me 4 freeeee! and a beautiful pretty skirt that shone and sparkled with every colour of the rainbow, pink leggings and super shiny rainbow heels with sparkling bows. I was wearing bright cherry red lipstick, foundation, eyeliner and rainbow eye shadow even though I didn't need it I was pretty enough already. I was walking outside Hogwarts. There was sun and rain so it created rainbows, which I was very happy about. A lot of goffiks stared at me. I looked at them and then they were so shocked that I noticed the, they backed away becuz I was better looking than them

"Hey Silky!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Harry Potter!

"What's up Harry?" I asked.

"Nothing." he said excitedly I think he liked me but was not saying it but den again I could mind red and saw that he was totally in luv.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away

AN: IS it good? PLZ tell me fangz!

[Evelyn]

Chapter 2.

AN: Fangz 2 gracefulgirl888 4 helpin me wif da chapta! BTW antisuitists stop flaming ma story ok!

The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was sunning and raining again. I opened the curtains of mah princess baed and drank some sparkling rainbow juice from a bottle that was unbrekable and i cud see da future in it I had. My bed was white and pink ivory and inside it was lovely purple and green velvet with pale pink expensive lace on the ends. I got out of my bed and took of my long evening gown which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a floaty frilly aqua and pink dress, apearl plaginum and diamond necklace, rainbow pumps with oink bows and heapsof ribbons on. I put on diamond and sapphiee earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair down so it flowed past my shoulders and made me luk spoooooooooooo pretty.

My friend, Sakura (AN: Swan dis is u!) woke up then and smiled gracefully at me. She flipped her long waist-length ivory white hair with pink streaks and opened her bright sapphire blue and amber orange eyes. She put on her Long sleeved flowy pretty sparkling t-shirt with a white floaty frilly skirt, platinum rings and bracelets and pointy high heels that shone like the sun. We put on our makeup (pink lipstick foundation and eyeliner.)

"OMG, I saw you talking to Harry Potter yesterday!" she said excitedly.

"Yeah? So?" I said, blushingwkth excitement.

"Do you like Harry?" she asked as we went out of the Gryffindor common room and into the Great Hall.

"No lol he likes me!!!!" I said excitedly

"Yeah right!" she exclaimed. Just then, Harry walked up to me.

"Hi." he said.

"Hi." I replied flirtily.

"Guess what." he said.

"What?" I asked.

"Well, Olano Blooooooom is hvong this play in Hogsmeade." he told me.

"Oh. My. God!" I screamed..

"Well…. do you want to go with me?" he asked.

I gasped... .... . . ...... . . . .... .. . . . .. . .. . .. . . .

[pinkycrystal]

Ember and I are working on this together and I gotta say, this is really fun. Just to remind you, we're not actually this bad at writing. We're just good at mocking.

Chapter 3.

AN: STOP FLAMMING DA STORY ANTISUISTS OK! odderwize fangs 2 da sue ppl 4 da good reveiws! FANGS AGEN SWAN! oh yeah, BTW I don't own dis.

On the night of the play I put on my high heeled golden boots with high heels. Underneath them were leggings that Luis AMAZANG. Then I put on a golden and white and silver strapless dress with all this corset stuff on the back. I put on matching gloves on my arms. I curled my hair and made it into a neat beautiful bun. I felt a little too excited then, so I tattloed one of my wrists with pretty hearts. I read an awesum buk. I painted my nails gold with silver stars and put on a little eyeliner. Then I put on some golden pink lipstick. I didn't put on foundation because ,y skin was perfect anyway. I drank some sparklesue juice so I was ready to go to the play.

I went outside. Harry was waiting there in front of his flying car. He was wearing a Olano bloooooooom t-shirt, jeans pants, and a little eyeliner (AN: A lot fo kewl boiz wer it ok!).

"Hi Harry!" I said in aexcited voice.

"Hi Silky." he said back. We walked into his flying black Mercedes-Benz (the license plate said AWSUM) and flew to the place with the play. When we got there, we both hopped out of the car. We went to the fancy seats decorated wth clower bushes with REal Fairies at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we watched Olano.

"They're taking the hobbits to Isengard
They're taking the hobbits to Isengard
They're taking the hobbits to Isengard
Gard gard gard gagard gard gard" sang Olano. (I don't own da lyrics 2 day song)

"Olano is so fudging hot." I said to Harry, pointing to him as he spoke with his amazing voice.

Suddenly Harry looked sad.

"What's wrong?" I asked as we cheered. Then I caught on.

"Hey, it's ok I don't like him better than YOU!" I said.

"Really?" asked Harry excited and sexily and he put his arm around me all protective.

"Really." I said. "Besides I don't even know Olano and he's going out with Some1f. I fudging hate her." I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly face.

The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Harry. After the concert, we drank some sparkle juice and asked Olano for autographs and photos with hem. Harry and I walked back into the Mercedes-Benz, but Harry didn't go back into Hogwarts, instead he drove the car into… .... . .. .. . . .... . .. . . . ...... .. . . the Forbidden Forest!

[pinkycrystal]

Chapter 4.

AN: I sed stup flaming ok silky's name is SICKY nut mary su OK! HARRY IS SOO IN LUV wif her dat he is acting defrent! dey nu eechodder b4 ok!

"HARRY!" I shouted. "What the fudge do you think you are doing?"

Harry didn't answer but he stopped the flying car and he walked out of it . I walked out of it too, curiously.

"What the fudging Sue?" I asked angrily.

"Silky?" he asked.

"What?" I snapped.

Harry leaned in extra-close and I looked into his preppy pink eyes(he was wearing color contacts) which revealed so much happiness and delight and then suddenly I didn't feel mad anymore.
And then… suddenly just as I Harry kissed me passionately.  Harry climbed on top of me and we started to make out keenlyagainst a tree. He took of my top and I took of his clothes. I even took of my bra. Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time.

"Oh! Oh! Oh! " I screamed. I was beginning to get an orgasm. We started to kiss everywhere and my porcelain body became all warm.And then….

"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUDGERS!"

It was….Dumbledore!

[Evelyn]

Chapter 5.

AN: STOP flaming! if u flam it menz ur a antisuist or a posr! Da only reson Dumbledeor swor is coz he had a hedache ok an on tup of dat he wuz mad at dem 4 having sexx! PS im nut updating umtil I get five good revoiws!

Dumbledore made and Draco and I follow him. He kept shouting at us angrily.

"You ludacris fools!" he shouted.

I started to cry tears of spadkling liquiddown my beautiful unblemishedface. Harry comforted me. When we went back to the castle Dumbledore took us to Professor McGonagall who were both looking very angry.

"They were having sexual intercourse in the Forbidden Forest!" he yelled in a furious voice.

"Why did you do such a thing, you mediocre dunces?" asked Professor McGonagall. She wiz appall.ed but I cus tel she wuz happy becuz she liked us both and wuz just acting 4 dumblydoree

And then Hadry shrieked. I don't think he got dat she wuz happy but he couldn't mind red "BECAUSE I LOVE HER!"

Everyone was quiet. Dumbledore still looked mad but Professor McGonagall said. "Fine. Very well. You may go up to your rooms."

Harry and I went upstairs while the teachers glared at us.

"Are you okay, Sicky?" harry asked me gently.

"Yeah I guess." I lied. I went to the girl's dorm and brushed my teeth and my hair and changed into a long evening dress style black with silvery lace all around it and black high heels. When I came out….

Harry was standing in front of the bathroom, and he started to sing. I was so flattered, even though he wasn't supposed to be there. We hugged and kissed. After that, we said goodnight and he reluctantly went back into his room.

[pinkycrystal]

This one probably isn't as good as the previous ones....

Chapter 6.

AN: shjt up goffs ok! PS I wnot update ubtil u give me goood revows!

The next day I woke up in my pretty bed. I put on an orange miniskirt that was all sparkly and had blue ribbon around the end and a matching top with yellow and pink skulls all over it and high heeled boots that were pink. I put on two pairs of heart earrings, and two stars in my ears. I spray-painted my hair with magenta.

In the Great Hall, I ate some Countess Choculina cereal with rainbow snowflake juice instead of milk and a glass of rainbow punch. Suddenly someone bumped into me. All the punch spilled over my top.

"Idiot!" I shouted angrily.I regretted saying it when I looked up cause I was looking into the porcelain face of a preppy boy with soft blond hair with pink streaks in it. He was wearing so much eyeshadow that I was going down his face and he was wearing neon green lipstick. He didn't have glasses and he was wearing pink contact lenses just like Harry's andare wasn't a pureblood anymore. He had a manly stubble on his chin. He had a sexy English accent. He looked exactly like Justin Bieber. He was so sexy that my body went all hot when I saw him kind of like an erection only I'm a girl so I didn't get one you sicko.

"I'm so sorry." he said in a shy voice.

"That's all right. What's your name?" I questioned.

"My name's Draco Malfoy although most people call me Angelo these days." he grumbled.

"Why?" I exclaimed.

"Because I love the taste of rainbow snowflake juice." he giggled.

"Well, I am a suepire." I confessed.

"Really?" he whimpered.

"Yeah." I roared.

We sat down to talk for a while. Then Harry came up behind me and told me he had a surprise for me so I went away with him.

[Misha]

This is amazing guys omg, one thing please please please at one of the hogsmeade concerts instead of having MCR lyrics have the lyrics to "They're taking the Hobbits to Isengard"

[pinkycrystal]

(Thanks Misha. And of course we're gonna make them sing that song! Next part will be up soon.)

[Evelyn]

Chapter 7 bring me 2 life

AN: wel ok u guyz im only writting dis cuz I got 5 god reviuws. n BTW I wont rite da nxt chapter til I git TIN god vons! STO FLAMING OR ILL REPORT U! Sicky isn't a Marie Sue ok she isn't perfect SHES A SUEIST! n she has problemz shes pretty 4 godz sake!

Harry and I held our porcelain hands with spakling silver and pinknail polish as we went upstairs. I was wearing planitnum sue rings on my nails in bluenail polish (AN: c doez dat sound lik a Maru Sue 2 u?). I waved to Angelo. Bright happiness was in his eyes. I guess he was jealous of me that I was going out with Harry but happy 2 cuz were perfect. Anyway, I went upstairs excitedly with Harry. We went into his room and locked the door. Then…

We started frenching passively and we took off each others clothes enthusiastically. He felt me up before I took of my top. Then I took off my frilled rainbo bra and he took off his pants. We went on the bed and started making out naked and then he put his boy's thingy in mine and we HAD no way. (c is dat stupid?)

"Oh Harry, Harry!" I screamed while getting an orgasm when all of a sudden I saw a tattoo I had never seen before on Draco's arm. It was a pink with an arrow through it. On it in preppy palace script writing were the words… Angelo!

I was so angry.

"You harsh words!" I shouted angrily, jumping out of the bed.

"No! No! But you don't understand!" Harry pleaded. But I knew too much.

"No, you fudging idiot!" I shouted. "You probably have AIDs anyway!"

I put on my clothes all huffily and then stomped out. Draco ran out even though he was naked. He had a really big you-know-what but I was too mad to care. I stomped out and did so until I was in Angelo's classroom where he was having a lesson with Professor Mcgonal and some other people.

"ANGELO MALFOY, YOU MOTHERFUDGER!" I yelled.

[Evelyn]

AN: stop flassing ok! if u do den u r a antiuiest!

Everyone in the class stared at me and then Harry came into the room even though he was naked and started begging me to take him back.

"Sicky, it's not what you think!" Harry screamed sadly.

My friend Shine'star Loretta Jones smiled at me understatedly. She flipped her long waste-length blonde and red hair and opened her stunning pink eyes like that she was wearing contact lenses on. She had pale skin that she was wearing makeup on. Shine'stat was kidnapped when she was born. Her real parents are suepires and one of them is a witch but Voldemort killed her mother and her father committed suicide because he was depressed about it. She still has nightmares about it and she is very and depressed. It also turns out her real last name is Jones and not Granger. (Since she has converted to Sueism she is in gridindor)

"What is it that you desire, you ridiculous dimwit!" Snape demeaned angrily in his cold voice but I ignored him.

"Angelo, I can't believe you cheated on me with Draco!" I shouted at him.

Everyone gasped.

I don't know why Sicky was so mad at me. I had went out with Angelo (I'm bi and so is Sicky) for a while but then he broke my heart. He dumped me because he liked Britney, a stupid antisuit. We were just good friends now. He had gone through horrible problems, and now he was sueist. (Haha, like I would hang out with a antisue.)

"But I'm not going out with Harry anymore!" said Angelo.

"Yeah fudging right! Fudge off, you harsh words!" I screamed. I ran out of the room and into the Forbidden Forest where I had lost my virility to Draco and then I started to bust into tears.

[Misha]

(I want someone to do a dramatic reading of this just coz)

[Evelyn]

Lol, did you enjoy the names?

[Misha]

Yes, especially Shine'star Loretta Jones

[Evelyn]

Oh yeah I thought of that one...good fun trying to change it...

[pinkycrystal]

Ember came up with that one, and Angelo Malfoy.